Is it just me?

Jan 26 2012 Published by under Uncategorized

I am at the point now where my grant is approaching submittable. As in, I have to submit it in a few days. Every time I get to this point I am deeply convinced that what I have written is a giant pile of shite words. I feel bad for the poor reviewer that will have to read (at least part) of it.

Even though I know that at least some of what I write is not so bad, right now I am convinced my grant is a steaming pile of crap. I really hope that I grow out of this someday.

I am very much looking forward to next week, when I can't think about this anymore.

7 responses so far

  • DrLizzyMoore says:

    Hooray! You're in the home stretch! Good luck. You can do it!!

  • Karen says:

    I can't speak to the specifics -- grant-writing is outside of my job description, thank goodness -- but every time I have a big project about to launch, I get anxiety dreams and am convinced everything is wrong and terrible. It's just Imposter Syndrome: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome

    Everything will work out. Just fake it 'til you make it!

  • Postdoc says:

    Wait, you feel that way too? I squirm and feel increasing loads of guilt, ineptitude, and fraudulence when I write fellowship and faculty applications and anything remotely self-promoting. I also feel a teensy bit of excitement that I might actually get to do the work... but it's often outweighed by worry that maybe I've bitten off way more than I can handle.

    I realize that your "crap" might be more poor exposition or overly optimistic assertions. Maybe you can tell us next week what you don't like about it.

    Well, good luck.

  • proflikesubstance says:

    I usually can't wait to hit the flush submit key fast enough when it comes to this time. You get so close to it tht it starts to jumble. I try and have someone read it over towards the end to make sure I haven't written a giant haiku by accident, but yeah.

  • Dr. Zeek says:

    Ditto. I'm laughing while I am reading things thinking "this will give the study section one big old chuckle..."

  • I have no doubt your grant is in outstanding shape!

  • gerty-z says:

    Thanks guys. Am looking forward to being past this. Holy jeebus I hope this gets easier

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